Sometimes it’s hard having a friend or a loved one that also has mind obstacles. Not everyone’s mind obstacles are the same, and sometimes they can clash and cause a need for you both to give each other space or let go of each other entirely. In Fiona Apple’s words from her song “Werewolf,”
“We can still support each other, all we gotta do’s avoid each other.”
And this is OKAY, healthy and necessary, but it’s difficult to validate that this is okay when all you feel is guilt.
Below is a list to help you think logically through this guilt and rid of all irrational, confusing and negative thought cycles about giving a friend or a loved one space (whether temporary space or permanent space) so you can find solace in the truth. Following the list are the lyrics to Fiona Apple’s song “Werewolf.” <3333
A Logical List
Written by Dorian Gomez:
Mental illnessMind obstacles mean some things said are rooted in a deep, irrational pain.- It is not necessarily their truth OR your truth.
Mental illnessMind obstacles may warp perception.Mental illnessMind obstacles have different forms, intensities and varies from person to person.- Each form is valid.
- Even if another person with
mental illnessmind obstacles says it’s not.
- Each person has a different set of needs.
- Some people prefer to be with people and some prefer to be alone.
- Coping mechanisms may develop and be perceived as manipulative or unhealthy.
- Coping mechanisms are deeply ingrained to help survive the toxicity of your own mind and traumatic experiences.
- It is sometimes difficult to be there for another person dealing with their mental health while you are dealing with your own.
- Mental health can change very quickly and it is important to be considerate and supportive but be careful not to sacrifice your own mental health at another’s expense.
-
It is not your fault.
- Ask them what you can do.
- To avoid triggering each other, take necessary space even though it may be painful.
- You can not “fix” each other.
- You can only offer support if you have the mental capacity to do so.
Make your own list to end negative thought cycles and send it to strangeisbeauty@gmail.com. We’ll post it on our blog :)
Lyrics to “Werewolf” by Fiona Apple
I could liken you to a werewolf the way you left me for dead
But I admit that I provided a full moon
But then again I was waving around a bleeding open wound[Chorus]:
And you are such a super guy ’til the second you get a whiff of me
We’re like a wishing well and a bolt of electricity
But we can still support each other, all we gotta do is avoid each other
Nothing wrong when a song ends in a minor key[Bridge]:
The lava of the volcano shot up hot from under the sea
One thing leads to another and you made an island of me[Verse 2]:
And I could liken you to a chemical the way you made me compound a compound
But I’m a chemical, too
Inevitable you and me would mix
‘cause in the end I’m a sensible girl
I know the fiction of the fix[Chorus]:
And you are such a super guy ’til the second you get a whiff of me
We are like a wishing well and a bolt of electricity
But we can still support each other, all we gotta do’s avoid each other
Nothing wrong when a song ends in a minor key.
