I surveyed 100 humans between the ages of 13 – when hormones are crazy – and 30 – when society says “pop out a baby before it’s too late!” – on whether they perceive relationships as necessary or unnecessary to be happy.
No slides are available in this galleryTo view captions on mobile, turn phone horizontal.
View all photos and answers from survey here.
In almost every movie, there HAS to be a relationship. Someone HAS to fall in love or be in love or else the sky will come crumbling down. And if the character is not in a relationship, they are sad, lonely and dreadfully miserable. Is this reality? Are real humans actually sad if they are not dating someone and if so, why?
Below are the survey results followed by a discussion on what is happiness.
“Society Says I’m Depressed Cuz I’m Single” Survey Results:
Anyone who’s single either wants to be dating or wishes they were in a relationship.
When you’re not dating someone, you..
56% Feel like something is missing
44% Are happy
If you never get married or have kids will you still be happy?
“A love affair and romantic relationship with self is truly the greatest love one can experience. Any other kind of relationship that graces your life after that is simply EXTRA,” said @moniqueantoinette100 on Instagram.
The truth is, no one can make you happy. People can only “reflect or distort your own inner happiness,” said the sage Sri Swami Satchidananda in the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. If you are not already content with yourself and your life, a romantic relationship will not fix this problem.
“Try not to confuse ‘attachment’ with ‘love.’ Attachment is about fear and dependency, and has more to do with love of self than love of another. Love without attachment is the purest love because it isn’t about what others can give you because you’re empty. It is about what you can give others because you’re already full.” – Yasmin Mogahed
So….if true love won’t make me happy….what is happiness?
What is happiness?
“Knowing who are you and doing the things you love because they make you happy.”
*no photo requested*
“My husband makes me happy.”
“We aren’t wired to feel happy based only on external circumstances,” said Marnie McNulty, energy healer.
Inner happiness is loving and caring for your self and all beings, being content with what you have, and living in the present moment. No goal, person, place, thing or title will give you that. Regardless of the pressure you feel by society (or by your parents) to be in a relationship, or get married and have kids, know that those things will happen if they are meant to happen, but happiness is inside you.
“Just like that, happiness is already in us. Wherever we go we reflect our happiness onto people and things. When we see a smiling face and feel happy, it is because the smiling face reflects our happiness. Just as a pure clean mirror reflects our face beautifully, certain our clean faces reflect our happiness. Then we say ‘She gives me happiness’. In other faces , our happiness reflect a distorted way and we say ‘I don’t like this person.’ Its absolute nonsense. No one can give us happiness or unhappiness, but can only reflect or distort our own inner happiness.” -Sri Swami Satchidananda
Sending you positive vibes,
The Strange is Beautiful
Shannen is a Peruvian-American writer, musician and yogi.
Learn more about her here.
Featured image artwork by Nico Appleford.